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Helping Your Adolescent Develop Skills to Manage Stress & Anxiety
Presented by:
Sara Harrison-Mills, MSW, LISW-SDirector of Youth & Prevention Programs, Syntero
Karen Keane, LISW-SStudent Support Specialist, Dublin City Schools
Objectives
� Mental & Emotional Wellness� STRESS◦ Academic Stress◦ Social Stress
� Recognizing Signs of Distress� Building Resilience◦ Strategies for Managing Stress & Anxiety
What is Mental Wellness?
◦ “A state of well-being in which the individual:� Realizes their own abilities� Can cope with the normal stresses of life� Works productively and fruitfully� Is able to make a contribution to their community◦ Internal & external factors affecting mental
wellness include:� Coping behaviors & skills� Relationships with loved ones and others� Financial issues� School/Work environment
Emotional Wellness� Emotional wellness implies:◦ Being able to handle normal amounts of stress◦ Being attentive to positive & negative thoughts,
feelings, and behavior◦ Being able to express emotions in a suitable manner◦ Being aware of and accepting our feelings, rather than
denying them◦ Being optimistic and enjoying life, despite occasional
frustrations and disappointments◦ Being able to set priorities◦ Being able to accept mistakes and learn from them◦ Being proactive and seeking support or information to
make informed decisions
STRESS!We all have it, but it’s not always bad.
: Moderate stress that is normal and beneficial
� Increased motivation, allows us to focus our energy� Short-term� Improved physical ability � Opportunity to become competent and confident
� Any examples of positive stressors in your or your student’s life?
A state of mental or emotional strain resulting from adverse or very demanding circumstances
Insignificant memo or RED ALERT!!
• Anxiety is normal. • Rollercoaster before a test
• Anxiety is necessary.
• Triggers our fight-flight response. • Gets our body ready to defend or
• protect itself.
• Internal smoke alarm.
Stress Reaction: Physiologic ResponseFight or Flight
� Very useful responses to actual threat or danger◦ Liver releases glucose
to fuel muscles◦ Heart pumps harder
to get blood where needed◦ Breathing faster to
take in more oxygen◦ Sweat more to help
bodies cool down
Stress Reaction� Excessive stress over time results in build-up of
stress hormones (i.e. cortisol)◦ Hormonal changes cause feelings of being
overwhelmed, fearful, and miserable� Physical signs of stress:◦ Disturbed sleeping pattern◦ Difficulty concentrating/learning◦ Persistent habits (throat clearing, nail biting)◦ Headaches/muscle aches◦ Changes in behavior◦ Increased susceptibility to anxiety
� Regressive behaviors� Acting-out behaviors
A teen’s smile can often hide identity struggles, anxiety, depression, self-loathing and pressure to succeed bubbling under the surface.
In our own backyard…
� Home� Social Stress◦ Peer Pressure◦ Mean Girls….and Boys
� School◦ Academics 7.0◦ Athletics
� Social media◦ Cyberbullying
� Drugs/Alcohol/Tobacco
What do you want to do tonight Brain?Same thing we do every night…..
� Associated factor: ◦ Lack of sleep
� Consequence of sleep deprivation: ◦ Inability to consolidate memory
◦ Inability to suppress negative affect, mediated by inability of prefrontal cortex to inhibit “emotional brain”
◦ fMRI investigations, paralleling sleep deprivation studies � Wolfson & Carskadon (1998)
� Additional issues:◦ ‘no alone time’, ’no down time’, taking away from
creativity/pondering/awe
Enough is enough� Warning signs: ◦ anxiety or panic attacks◦ a feeling of being constantly pressured, hassled, and
hurried◦ irritability and moodiness◦ physical symptoms, such as stomach problems,
headaches, or even chest pain◦ allergic reactions, such as eczema or asthma◦ problems sleeping◦ drinking too much, smoking, overeating, or doing
drugs◦ sadness or depression◦ self-injurious behavior
Signs the STRESS is Becoming TOO Much
Parents, take notice when your student shows any of the following changes.
� Increased tardiness or absences from school — one of the earliest signs� Angry or aggressive behaviors� Poor concentration � Youth seems withdrawn� Youth appears overly anxious, or worried, even fearful� Excessive sleeping, beyond usual teenage fatigue� Loss of self-esteem� Abandonment or loss of interest in favorite pastimes� Unexpected and dramatic decline in academic performance� Weight loss and loss of appetite
Anxiety Disorders� Separation Anxiety Disorder
� Selective Mutism
� Specific Phobia
� Social Anxiety Disorder
� Panic Disorder
� Agoraphobia
� Generalized Anxiety Disorder
� Persistent, excessive worries and/or fears� Restlessness, feeling on edge� Fatigue� Difficulties with concentration� Irritability� Sleep disturbance� Avoidance� Physical sx’s-headaches, stomachaches� Panic sx’s
◦ Heart palpitations
◦ Sweating◦ Trembling◦ Shortness of breath◦ Nausea, stomach distress
◦ Dizzy/light headed◦ Fear of losing control, fear of dying◦ Chills or heat sensations◦ Numbness or tingling◦ Feeling detached from oneself
Where does it come from?
� Genes� Negative Thoughts� Avoiding� Parent Reaction� Parent Modeling� Stressors
Where You Come In
� So what can parents do to help their teens manage stress and help build protective factors?
Resilience. A silver bullet?
� “Resilience is the capacity to rise above difficult circumstances, the trait that allows us to exist in this less-than-perfect world while moving forward with optimism and confidence.”
� “Building Resilience in Children and Teens”, 2015, pg.4
Building Resiliency-Starts at Home
Unpredictable PredictableSevere ModerateProlonged Controlled
VULNERABILITY RESILIENCE
Bruce D. Perry, MD, PhD
STRESS
7 C’s Model of Resilience
� Competence� Confidence� Connection� Character� Contribution� Coping � Control
Competence
� Ability to handle situations effectively.
� Acquired through actual experience.
� Must first be allowed to develop skill set to trust own judgements, make responsible choices and face difficult situations.
Competence-Where YOU come in!
� Help your child focus on strengths and how to build them
� Focus on what does well vs. mistakes� Be clear and concise when addressing
mistakes vs. “You always mess up”� Allow your child to make “safe mistakes”
vs. hovering� Avoid comparing your child to others
Noticing, Praising, Criticizing
Do Say Don’t Say
� What did you learn in school today?
� Were you proud of your art piece?
� I love watching you think. You work so hard to figure things out.
� I really admire how you’ll search for answers & get help until you feel confident.
� How did you do on your test?
� Did you get a blue ribbon?� You’re so smart.� I’m so proud of your
grades.
Confidence
� True confidence, the solid belief in one’s own abilities, is rooted in competence.
� Children gain confidence by demonstrating competence in real situations.
Confidence-Where YOU come in!
� Express expectations for best qualities◦ NOT achievements, but personal qualities (i.e.
fairness, integrity, persistence, kindness)
� Catch your child being good� Avoid unintentionally pushing your child
further than realistic expectations◦ Cause to stumble and lose confidence
Coping
� Best protection against unsafe, worrisome behaviors is WIDE repertoire of positive, adaptive coping strategies
� Model healthy coping skills/stress management-exercise, sleep, nutrition
� Allow imaginative problem solving� Engage in Active Listening vs. Impulsive
Responses
Coping Strategies
� Explore and clarify feelings
� Think positively◦ Positive appraisal◦ Rational thinking
� Get support◦ Family Communication◦ Maintaining close
friendships� Physical Activity� Meditation/down time� SLEEP� Unplug
� Anger� Avoidance� Substance Use� Blaming others� Withdrawing� Acting aggressively� Self-Injury/Eating
disorders
Adaptive/Effective Mal-Adaptive/Ineffective
Connection
� Close relational tiesà solid sense of securityà produces strong valuesàprevents from seeking destructive alternatives
� Allow and normalize ALL emotions� Create space for connection-
physical/mental� Directly address conflict� Encourage pride in ethnic, religious, cultural
groups
Character
� Fundamental sense of right and wrong� Strong sense of self-worth & confidence� Future-oriented � Model importance of caring for others◦ Service Learning
� Clearly express expectations about racist, ethnic, or hateful statements or stereotypes
� Encourage effort and tenacity
Contribution� “…powerful lesson when children learn…[the] world is
a better place because they are in it”. � Instills sense of purpose� Opportunity to surround contributing teens with “thank
yous” rather than low expectations or condemnation that many teens endure
� Model generosity � Create opportunities for contribution
Control� “When children realize that they can control the
outcomes of their decisions and actions, they’re more likely to know that they have the ability to do what it takes to bounce back.”
� Vs. Students who feels “everything always happens to me”à become passive, pessimistic, depressed
� Encourage recognition of small accomplishments� Discipline as form of teaching rather than
punishment or controlling
Where rubber meets the road
� Decision Making Trees◦ Break down vague lessons- “Don’t drink”◦ Adolescents are still developing ability to
think abstractly◦ Sketch out possibilities by eliciting possibilities
from your child� Help connect the dots � Identify choices� Saving face can outweigh safety concerns
Thank you to ADAMH Board
Community Education presentations from Synteroare possible thanks to school-based prevention
grants funded by the ADAMH Board of Franklin County
Syntero, Inc. All rights reserved. 2016
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